Hello World



Do you see why I decided to set up a blog??

This kind of linguistic genius must be shared!

‘Hello’ seems an appropriate place to start, though – beginning at the beginning if we want to be all David Copperfield about it. Which I don’t, particularly, but the damage is done.

C’est la vie.

So, a little about me?

My name is Chloe, though most people (including virtual strangers and estranged relatives) call me Chlo. I am 16 and I reside in a small English town tacked onto the suburbs of London. That place where The Office was set. Yep, it’s just as bleak as it looks in the opening credits, but that roundabout has been sponsored by a phone company and now has flowers and shit on it. Shit as in stuff, not shit as in shit (one would hope).


I am much less punk-rock than I think I am. I have a serious cooking show addiction – if it’s a show about making cake look like other stuff, I’m in. The Barefoot Contessa is a total babe. Masterchef Wherever-the-fuck-it-is-this-time makes my heart happy, mainly because of the amount of times people say ‘I’m not here to make friends, I’m here to win’. Good times.


I also LOVE RuPaul’s Drag Race. If you’ve never watched it, go watch it right now!!!!! It’s like America’s Next Top Model for Drag Queens and it is stupendous! It’s on Netflix.




What else…?


I am a fangirl.


One of those. The manic ones who faint at the sight of Daleks or boxes that particular shade of blue. The ones who adore superhero movies and always stick around to watch the end scene, no matter how many weird looks we get from the guy sweeping up the popcorn.



The ones who LIVE for Stan Lee’s cameos.

The ones who adore actors like Benadryl Cucumber or Benjamin Cumbersome or whatever his bloody name is.

One of the ones that cried loud, ugly sobs in The Harry Potter studio tour and still feel a little empty, deep inside, when there isn’t a new HP movie each summer.


I have many, many heroes that range from Rebel Wilson (Fat Amy) and Tina Fey to Olivia Coleman  and Micheal Fassbender and Duff Goldman. And you, you lucky things, will become intimately acquainted with my love for all of them.


That is if you ever read/continue to read this shit-show of a blog.

I live in hope that you do.

Live long and prosper, until next time…

Chloe xo